The time with all the broken pieces

Today I set out to write about something else, something completely different, something I thought I'd never write about, but God had other plans (I guess He doesn't want me to write about that other topic, huh?).

Anyway, I've been having a couple of off days. Not sure if its because my kids have been sick since Monday, and by Wednesday night, I finally caught it, or if its just the fact that I haven't worked out the last couple of days (if you work out regularly, you know how addicting those endorphins can be). So, when I went in the kitchen to cook lunch and dropped one the the mixing bowls I use the most, a loud curse word came out of my mouth (not that I never ever curse, I'm not perfect, but I try really hard not to, especially with the kids around), and I couldn't help that immediate feeling of defeat, of loss, of frustration. 

Isn't it amazing how easy it is to go towards the negative at first instance? 

But God (you know I love these two words) despite my reaction, as I was picking up the broken pieces, gave me a song; without even thinking about it the words started coming out of my mouth: 

All these pieces
Broken and scattered
In mercy gathered
Mended and whole
Empty handed
But not forsaken
I've been set free
I've been set free

 Then that feeling of defeat and frustration turned into hope and joy. I thought about how those pieces of glass scattered all over my kitchen floor have no use to me anymore, and as I threw each piece in the trash, I saw myself in this broken mixing bowl, but unlike these worthless broken piece in my hand, in His hand our broken pieces are mended and made whole, and turned into something new. God can take our broken life, our broken relationships, our broken world, and turn it into something beautiful.  

His grace is amazing, His voice is sweet, He brings new mercy, He freely offers salvation.
We are broken, but He makes us whole.

I don't think I will ever fully understand His goodness, but I sure am grateful for it.

About messing up

So you messed up really bad today... Now what?

First ask yourself: Did you really mess up that bad? 

What makes one "mess up" worst than another? 

I think most of us have been conditioned - either by the way we grew up or by society - to think that sins have "levels", that one can be worse than another, and while some sins do have bigger consequence, the reality is that to God, all sins are the same. 

I struggled with this for so long; I would do something that I though qualified as a big sin (mostly because of the way I was raised), and I would be sad, and distance myself from God. I would listen to that voice that told me I was unworthy and damaged, that I was beyond saving; the voice that said that God would not love me when I was not "okay" with Him. I would even feel ashamed to sing the worship songs that kept playing over and over in my head (looking back I think that was the Holy Spirit drawing me back to Him). 

It wasn't until recently, in my early thirties, after almost three years in this amazing church where we are taught to live in our true identity in Christ that I realized that this voice I heard every time I "messed up" was not God's voice, it was the enemy. The thief who wants me to dwell on my sin, to distance myself from God, to feel guilt and condemnation. Every time I fell into the enemy's trap I was letting him win another battle... But God (have I mentioned how much I love those two words?) wants to tell us something completely different, he wants us to know the truth: that there is no condemnation in Christ Jesus, He already forgave our sins and He wants to have a relationship with us.

"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." John 10:10 (NIV)

Now I ask you: If the God who created the universe, who sent His one and only son to die for us can forgive us, why are we so hard on ourselves? Why is it sometimes harder for us to forgive ourselves than it is to forgive others? 

"Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus " Rom 8:1 (NIV)

Jesus chose to pay the price for all our sins past, present and future, while we were still sinners. That's how much He loves us. Don't let this sacrifice be in vain by letting the enemy win.

We are forgiven, made new, cleansed. We are righteous and redeemed. We are free. We are loved. We are are the sons and daughters of the God who is good and through whom all things are possible. 

So you messed up today - Jesus already forgave you, accept his forgiveness and move on. Accept His grace and choose to do better next time. We can have a much better life by spending more time building a relationship with God, and getting to know Him better (not just about Him) than we ever will by dwelling on our sinned. Its time for us to live in the fullness of life made true for us by Jesus. We can learn to accept His forgiveness.